I’ve been listening to music from my better days… like back 1999-2000 ish, though some songs are pre then which are still good.

ARGH!!! I’m waiting for the holidays to come round, because I’ll snap out of it then… hopefully. My mind is playing up again and getting the better of me and I’m scared. Not scared as in *scared* but just scared. Of what I don’t know. My fears? maybe but I doubt theres not too many there except for creepy crawly insects that is. But scared of becoming before, scared that one day I might actually do something stupid. That’s not to say I’m going to do something… but just knowing the feeling and thinking the thoughts is real enough for me even if they are a very remote possibility in a sea of options. It’s mind over matter. I just think… what if.

Dreams are dreams and dreams must die, oh you took away what once was mine… Goodbye dad now, and goodbye mum, don’t follow me down, don’t rush into this…

just some lyrics from a song… makes you think